"I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight."
- Rita Rudner
"I'm not a vegetarian, but I eat animals who are."
- Groucho Marx
"Everyone's a pacifist between wars. It's like being a vegetarian between meals."
- Colman McCarthy
"Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning "lousy hunter.""
- Andy Rooney
"You can shoot the tiger, or stay out of his way, but you cannot pronounce him a vegetarian."
- Richard Mitchell
"I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants."
- A. Whitney Brown
"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting a bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian."
- Dennis Wholey
"I did not become a vegetarian for my health, I did it for the health of the chickens."
- Isaac Bashevis Singer
"If slaughterhouses had glass walls, everyone would be a vegetarian."
- Paul McCartney
"Appeasers believe that if you keep on throwing steaks to a tiger, the tiger will become a vegetarian."
- Heywood C. Broun