Funny Success Quotes

"How can they say my life is not a success? Have I not for more than 60 years got enough to eat and escaped being eaten?"
- Logan Smith

"I do not like to repeat successes, I like to go on to other things."
- Walt Disney

"The secrets of success are a good wife and a steady job. My wife told me."
- Howard Nemerov

"Ours is a world where people don't know what they want and are willing to go through hell to get it."
- Don Marquis

"The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success."
- Irving Berlin

"If we do not succeed, then we run the risk of failure."
- Dan Quayle

"If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you."
- Anonymous

"If at first you don't succeed, take the tax loss."
- Kirk Kirkpatrick

"You will find the key to success under the alarm clock."
- Benjamin Franklin

"My formula for success is rise early, work late, and strike oil."
- Paul Getty

"There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?"
- Kin Hubbard

"Do not be in a hurry to succeed. What would you have to live for afterwards? Better make the horizon your goal; it will always be ahead of you."
- William M. Thackeray

"Many a man owes his success to his first wife and his second wife to his success."
- Jim Backus

"A successful man is one who can lay a firm foundation with the bricks others have thrown at him."
- David Brinkley

"Pray that success will not come any faster than you are able to endure it."
- Elbert Hubbard

"To guarantee success, act as if it were impossible to fail."
- Dorothea Brande

"Success didn't spoil me, I've always been insufferable."
- Fran Lebowitz

"Behind every successful man there is a surprised woman."
- Maryon Pearson

"Even on the most exalted throne in the world we are only sitting on our own bottom."
- Michel Eyquem De Montaigne

"Everybody loves success, but they hate successful people."
- John McEnroe

"Success is like dealing with your kid or teaching your wife to drive. Sooner or later you'll end up in the police station."
- Fred Allen

"Let us be thankful for fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed."
- Mark Twain

"If at first you don't succeed; you are running about average."
- M. H. Alderson

"We must walk consciously only part way toward our goal, and then leap in the dark to our success."
- Henry David Thoreau

"Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom."
- George S. Patton

"A person is a success if they get up in the morning and gets to bed at night and in between does what he wants to do."
- Bob Dylan

"Give me a couple of years, and I’ll make that actress an overnight success."
- Samuel Goldwyn

"Be awfully nice to them going up, because you're gonna meet them all coming down."
- Jimmy Durante

"We must believe in luck. For how else can we explain the success of those we don't like ?"
- Jean Cocturan


Funny Quotes Article Archive