"Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter."
- Cecilia Egan
"Love is an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch."
- Cathy Carlyle
"Remember, beneath every cynic there lies a romantic, and probably an injured one."
- Glenn Beck
"Love is like a roller coaster, when it's all over you throw up!"
"A man is already halfway in love with any woman who listens to him."
- Brendan Francis
"Don't threaten me with love, Baby. Let's just go walking in the rain."
- Billie Holiday
"Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy."
- Henry Kissinger
"Men are from Earth. Women are from Earth. Deal with it."
- George Carlin
"To love and win, is the best thing. To love and lose, is the next best thing."
- William M. Thackeray
"Nothing spoils romance so much as a sense of humour in the woman."
- Oscar Wilde
"An archaeologist is the best husband any woman can have; the older she gets, the more interested he is in her."
- Agatha Christie
"Two souls and one thought, two hearts and one pulse."
"How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"
- Albert Einstein
"Once you have loved someone, you’d do anything in the world for them except love them again."
"Like the measles, love is most dangerous when it comes late in life."
- Lord Byron
"Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away."
- Dorothy Parker
"My heart's in the right place. I know, 'cuz I hid it there."
- Carrie Fisher
"Love is a mutual self-giving which ends in self-recovery."
- Fulton J. Sheen
"To be in love is merely to be in a state of perceptual anesthesia."
"The four most important words in any marriage..."I'll do the dishes.""
"I love being married. It’s so great to find one special you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
- Rita Rudner
"Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a strike of luck."
"You know it's love when you keep holding hands even after they are sweaty."
"I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury."
- Groucho Marx